Saturday, December 6, 2008

Sexy Time Week: Can't Sing, Can't Write Comics

.....aaaaand we're back. Today, it's a look at the oh-so-awesome Jaguar God #4 from Verotik Comics, the adult line overseen (and in this case, written by) one Glenn Danzig.

The series premise being that there's a primitive jungle land overseen and protected by the mythical Jaguar God, who manifests as a barbarian cloaked in Jaguar skins. Your basic excuse to have naked jungle chicks, and people getting hacked up with axes. That's an idea I can get behind, but will it be any good? The readers seemed to think so:
On with the show!

In this tale, Spanish forces led by some 3-armed dude have invaded the jungle and are enslaving/killing/torturing the natives.

Don't forget, this is an adult comic. There's not just going to be nudity, there's going to be "adult situations". How will the male captors handle being surrounded by all that girl flesh?

Cue explicit rape scene where 4 guys try to have their way with one of the slave girls. I'll spare you the visual evidence, and just skip to the rescue by our hero!

I'm all for rapists getting cut in half, tbh

Conveniently, the men get to wear clothes or loin cloths. The women just have to stay naked and strike revealing poses. Come to think of it, this jungle must be in Brazil, because the girls all have the wax jobs to prove it. Pubes do not a good comic make.

So anyway, Jaguar God runs around killing people for a few pages, then it's time for the boss fight.

Have a read of those awesomely descriptive captions. I'm so glad they thought to describe what was happening in the pictures, because I couldn't figure it out on my own.

That's that, and it's all over bar the letters page, which is just as 'good' as the comic.

Behold, the "real world" goodness of the Jaguar God!

Yeah, DC and Marvel would be totally jealous of all the artists causing the several-month delays between issues. Having a different artist every issue (and 2 in this one) had absolutely nothing to do with scheduling ;)

This thing really is crap on so many different fronts. Weak plot (why would Jaguar God let dozens of his people be slaughtered, but intervene when one of them gets raped?), very skimpy dialogue, captions mirroring exactly what the artist is showing you. Not to mention the typical idea of "adult" comics meaning you get to show all sorts of things happening to women, rather than coming up with interesting stories that happen to involve sex related stuff.

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